TAIPEI (The China Post) — Taiwanese YouTuber Ray Du (阿滴) opened up about his struggle with depression and revealed how he was in a dark place last year on Sunday.
In 2020, Du had raised funds for Taiwan in April and recorded an English video telling the World Health Organization (世界衛生組織, WHO) about how Taiwan can help with the pandemic.
In addition, he also purchased a full-page ad in the New York Times (紐約時報) saying, “Taiwan Can Help” hoping to convince Tedros Adhanom Ghebreyesus (譚德塞), the Director-General of the WHO, to include Taiwan in the WHO.
On Sunday, Du revealed that following the event, he went into depression for some time.
He said that he had been living with depression for about a year now, which began around the end of 2020.
Du added that he took a break from the internet because he was in such a dark place.
During that time, he barely uploaded any videos on YouTube.
Du stated, “My depression actually started when I first published the ‘Taiwan Can Help’ ad last year. I constantly felt unworthy and anxious. I was very scared about all the hate I was going to receive from that ad.”
“I also struggled with a sleeping disorder so I had trouble falling asleep every night. Every time I received any hate, I always ended up crying,” the YouTuber said.
He added that at the time he was not aware of how severe his depression was because he was so caught up with his YouTube career.
He believed that as long as he was occupied with work, his mental health would naturally improve.
Du revealed that several months after April 2020, he was under a large amount of stress and pressure. It was not until September, that he realized the stress he was experiencing was too much for him to handle.
He recalled that during a speech in Tainan, he had a hard time breathing on stage and was unable to really make out what he wanted to say. He then cut his speech short and fled back to Taipei.
He explained that he basically had a panic attack once he arrived back home, adding that that was when he realized he was not okay.
At the end of September, Du went to a mental health clinic. In the beginning, he was diagnosed with anxiety and was sent home with medication.
However, later in the week, his symptoms slowly progressed. So he decided to go back to the doctor who then prescribed him antidepressants.
Du said after about a year of struggling with depression, he has been getting much better which is why he decided to open up about his story with depression to the public by making a video and posting it on his YouTube channel.
Du hoped that his story can inspire others who are also struggling with depression to stay strong.
He also wanted to raise awareness for mental health problems, so people can understand how it is something many people have to deal with.